Dealing with non-rule breakers

[Tyler]

I am just curious on what everyone does with users who are breaking no rules, but annoys almost your entire userbase on every single thread or post?

[Jan]

Sometimes it is helpful to contact the member and mention there have been many complaints about their posting habits and that sometimes works. If not (after a second try), give them a few days off to reflect on whether this is the right forum for them or not.

[SoftWareRevue]

Rght. Even though they may not be breaking a rule or trying to be intentionally disruptive, if they are disruptive, you need to put a stop to it.

Sometimes it's not easy explaining to them how their actions (that break no guidelines) are detrimental to the flow of the forum. You're bound to hear, "Why?" a lot when you speak with the member. And sometimes you just need to say, "Because it's bothersome. It may be suitable elsewhere. But, it's not suitable here."

[writespeak]

Sometimes it's not easy explaining to them how their actions (that break no guidelines) are detrimental to the flow of the forum.

I agree. And how you explain helps determine the results you get. :) I suggest this approach:

- Point out what (if anything) is positive about the member's contributions.
- Explain how his posts are being received and why (e.g. tone, argumentativeness, repetitiousness).
- Suggest how the member can contribute in more positive ways.

Just telling someone that their actions are wrong puts them on the defensive. Suggesting what they can do instead gives them somewhere positive to go. Of course some people won't be receptive no matter how we present the message, but the way we communicate does make a lot of difference with most people. :)

Lois

[CD Burnt]

y'all talking about me? I know you are. http://img100.imageshack.us/img100/3079/pink30vt.gif

[Mikey]

Write rules to outlaw whatever annoying activity they are embarking on.

[SoftWareRevue]

Write rules to outlaw whatever annoying activity they are embarking on.What if they just don't shower enough? Or rarely brush their teeth?

I think we're talking about things that, on occasion, aren't too bad. But, when they happen often can be disruptive to the community as a whole.

Maybe it's just someone that starts threads on subjects that aren't really suited for the rest of the audience. When an off color thread happens, it's usually shrugged off and no one participates. But, what if someone has decided that they need to do these threads often?

Hard to come up with an example.

/me puts teh thinking cap on. :cap:

[Jan]

Write rules to outlaw whatever annoying activity they are embarking on.
/me uploads a 100MB ebook :evilb:

[adb22791]

You could always boil their disruptive behavior down to spam, depending on what they did. Usually you can just tell a user their being disruptive, and they leave. However theres always one wonderful little case that doesn't want to leave. Instead, this special case wants to spam your members and other staff, attempt to DDoS your site, and register new accounts to spam your forums.
But thats what APF is for :yippee:

[vito]

What if they just don't shower enough? Or rarely brush their teeth?
:blush: :blush: :blush:

Yikes, tough room! Erm, I'll just let myself out... :out:

Vito

[writespeak]

What if they just don't shower enough?

We actually had that problem on occasion at the school where I used to teach (with students age 18+). One time it was so bad that you could smell the person before you saw her, and it very unpleasant to be in the same room with her. One of her teachers got the job of talking to her and explaining the problem.

Problems need to be talked about, and in a way that leaves the other person with behaviour options that work for other people.

Lois

[A_Jelly_Doughnut]

I have that problem every day...its other people's perfumes and colognes. I don't want to smell you 10 feet away (or more!)

Especially because most perfumesand colognes stink like rotten onions.

[Aussie Bob]

We actually had that problem on occasion at the school where I used to teach (with students age 18+). One time it was so bad that you could smell the person before you saw her, and it very unpleasant to be in the same room with her. One of her teachers got the job of talking to her and explaining the problem.
Was she from a poor family, or just too lazy to shower or bath daily?

Not that I'm saying that poor people aren't clean or anything.

[writespeak]

Was she from a poor family

Our students were age 18+ and paid hundreds of dollars a month to attend the school and live in a foreign city, so no, she wasn't poor. She was older than 18 too.

or just too lazy to shower or bath daily?

I don't know what her problem was. I was just supporting the point that not everything can be covered by rules. We had rules at the school too, but we didn't have any rules about personal hygiene. With some problems, you just need to deal with them as they come up.

Lois

[Jan]

With some problems, you just need to deal with them as they come up.
Which is what this thread is about (luckily we can't smell people online :fairy: ). There are a lot of grey areas where there isn't an easy answer on forums. Nuisances need talking to if too many complain. If it is a small forum and the behaviour of a certain member irks the administrator and some members, then shoot him/her off a PM and try to explain.