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Jan
03-11-2006, 01:03 AM
My niece sent these to me and some of them really cracked me up as they are so true :)

Why? Why? Why?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the
batteries are getting weak?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know
there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion
stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialised?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a
shopping cart then apologises for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's
falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in
summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

Aussie Bob
03-11-2006, 05:25 AM
hehe, good reading there. :)

:think:

Scott
03-11-2006, 06:30 AM
Nice find, I know I can relate to a few of them. :)

Tyler
03-11-2006, 11:18 AM
I saw this a few weeks ago, but still funny :)

/me is guilty about the remote :blush:

Jan
03-11-2006, 06:05 PM
/me is guilty of the fridge, table and vacuum cleaner :P

SoftWareRevue
03-11-2006, 11:58 PM
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?Why are you watching me vacuum? :dfingers:

A_Jelly_Doughnut
03-12-2006, 04:20 PM
Its the durned squirrels that are watching you. Jan isn't quite able to teleport yet.

I'm guilty of the vacuum one.

Aussie Bob
03-13-2006, 01:58 AM
Why are you watching me vacuum? :dfingers:
It was on the live Dennis cam that the squirrels setup. :D

Although next time, for gawd sake man, wear some pants. :eek2: :giggle:

Scott
03-13-2006, 12:16 PM
Although next time, for gawd sake man, wear some pants. :eek2: :giggle:
Perhaps the squirrels have been stealing his stuff. Although what use they'd have for them...I dread to think :nervous:

KimmiKat
03-13-2006, 01:29 PM
I'd be worried about those squirrels logging on to Dennis's computer.

Here's one for the list above.

"How come when you drop something in the bathroom, it'll bounce 3 metres into the loo?"

SoftWareRevue
03-17-2006, 01:37 PM
Why? Why? Why?Why is it that, when some people hear or see FU, they think FY? :crazy: